Nancy Grace would be weighing in on CNN, Greta Van Susteren and Bill O'Reilly on Fox, Dr. Phil would be giving his take on what it all means to America and the world, and writers for Jay Leno, David Letterman, and Conan O'Brien would be in overdrive churning out the jokes.

Inevitably, Domi and Stronach would get a lucrative book deal, and a huge contract for their own reality TV show called "Jugs and the Jock" that would pull in far more viewers than did the screwed-up Gotti family, Osbourne family, and the current Gene Simmons family.

At some point, Stronach would be persuaded to run for governor of California, winning on the New Family Values ticket, and Domi would make a fortune as Reverend Tie, TV evangelist, converting more sex sinners than Billy Graham ever did on his best day, the faithful sending in donations for the Reverend Tie Designer Condom authorized by Reverend Tie Domi Enterprises Inc.

Except for Frank magazine, extramarital affairs involving high and mighty public figures in Canada have had a history of a mainstream media self-imposed off-limits, even if they've led to divorce proceedings, the salacious details a matter of public court documents.

But as our own society continues its descent into an American-style "anything goes," the gloves are coming off, two recent examples the tickling divorce settlement details of former Senators head coach Jacques Martin, and, now, Affair Domi/His Wife/Stronach.

Had our culture been the American culture, legal and otherwise in these type matters, we'd have had an array of Canadian supermarket tabloids along the lines of the National Enquirer exposing stuff that -- in the area of sports for example -- mainstream journalists with longevity have known about, but chose not to write (nor would their papers have run) for reasons of a potential libel lawsuit coupled with a very Canadian "There but for the grace of God go I" philosophy of see, hear, and speak, no sexual evils.

Would Canadians have considered it in the public interest to have read back in the '70s that the reason a star Ottawa Rough Rider demanded to be traded (it was fulfilled) was because his wife was having a torrid affair with one of his teammates, known by the other players, and the cuckolded husband couldn't bear the atmosphere of humiliation?

Or that another Rough Rider was traded on the official grounds it was simply a "good deal" for both teams after the general manager dissuaded an angry father from having his daughter go to police to lay a sexual assault charge against the player whom she'd been dating?

Or the court details on the divorce of another Toronto Maple Leaf player in the '80s who discovered his wife was cheating on him with a teammate?

Or the Boston Bruins married star with the pristine public image who, in the '70s when he visited Toronto to play, would have a teammate friend pimp for him in bars by giving out a second hotel room key to compliant young women willing to bed the star?

Or the Canadian-team NHL player, a secret cross-dresser, who was traded to save the club potential embarrassment after it learned that he -- dressed as a woman -- got into a fist fight in a bar with the wife of a guy who took a fancy to him?

Some, if not all, of the above stories are known by many veteran journalists, and had we been America, not Canada, they would have come to the attention of the supermarket tabs and gossip mags and been published, with identities, all in the name of freedom of speech. And not necessarily ignored by the mainstream media, either.

Do the media have any business in the bedrooms of Sportsworld? Should court divorce proceedings be their only green light? Harold Ballard, who owned the Maple Leafs, once told me for a magazine piece: "I'm like a lot of the married players -- I have a girlfriend in every NHL city."

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