Geoff Roberts has so many positive things to say about Crescent School, the independent boys school in Toronto where he's headmaster, that his words almost can't keep pace with his thoughts. So it's somewhat surprising to learn that his four sons went through the public-school system.

Cash is the cold, hard reality for many parents. The bottom line is that fees at an independent day-school average between $17,000 and $20,000 a year per child. At boarding school, once you include all the incidentals, it rounds off to a whopping $40,000 out of a family's annual budget. It's no wonder that money is often the make-it-or-break-it factor in deciding where to educate your children.

Decked out in ivy and plaid, private schools are often seen as the embodiment of privilege. And there's no doubt that many of their students come from families where money is not an issue. But the schools themselves -- many of which espouse core philosophies of community service and world vision -- are anxious to dispel this aura of exclusivity.

"One of the challenges for schools like ours," says Susan Ditchburn, the principal of Havergal College in Toronto, "is that we want our girls to have an opportunity to see what a typical community is like -- and this is not typical when you think about the socio-economics of most parents here.

Many private schools agree with Dr. Ditchburn and are committed to providing as much financial aid as possible. In addition to being a laudable goal, it's just good business. Schools' reputations ride on the quality of the students they attract, and money, certainly, is no guarantee of getting bright, well-rounded team players.

Although most private schools pride themselves on having some mix of scholarships and bursaries available, the pool they're working with varies quite significantly from place to place.

It's not surprising that the older, more established institutions -- some of which have been around for over 100 years -- have a much larger core of wealthy and well-connected alumni to draw upon.

For instance, at Ridley College in St. Catharines, Ont., which was established in 1880, the annual amount of financial aid available is $1.7-million. Thirty per cent of its 600 students get partial aid. The average amount is $1,000; the highest is $30,000. Basic tuition for day students ranges from $15,000 for Grade 5 to $21,700 for high school years.

Havergal College offers $350,000 in financial aid a year, icluding full tuition for five of its 900 students. The average bursary is $8,000. Basic tuition for kindergarten to Grade 12 day students is about $18,600.

For some parents, Dr. Ditchburn says, the $8,000 bursary is definitely the tipping point beyond which they would not be able to afford the school. It's the lucky students whose fees are paid for by family trusts or grandparents with means.

At most private schools in Canada, the bulk of financial aid given out is in the form of bursaries (based on economic need) rather than scholarships (based on academic or extra-curricular merit). To avoid any suggestion of conflict of interest, they use an independent third-party company to assess each family's financial declarations.

Some parents turn to creative compromises if they decide they can't afford private schooling for the entire duration of their child's education: They concentrate on the specific years when they believe it's most likely to make a difference.

For instance, they'll save up for an all-girls school during the adolescent years, when their daughters are more vulnerable to a dip of self-confidence. Or they'll choose boarding schools in Grades 11 and 12, when university is just around the corner and they want to ease their children into independent living and learning.

So, if you're trying to figure out whether you can afford private school, pull out your calculator and family budget, and start planning as early as possible. Most schools post fee schedules on their websites (some of them offer discounts for multiple children from one family, as well as creative payment options, such as monthly instalments or bundling of extra-curricular costs).

And, by all means, if money is an issue, shop around and don't be intimidated about contacting the schools to discuss your financial situation and the amount of aid that could be available to you. You won't be the first, nor the last.

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